How to Kill Your Cat--Almost

So this is the craziest story ever and I wouldn't believe it if it hadn't happened to me, so of course, I want to share it with you all.

I am known to go through cats quickly.  Meaning, they have a very nice life at my house until they meet their untimely death by fisher cat, wolf, car, or whatever else might eat a cat at night.  This is usually after I have spent #allthemoney on getting them fixed and all shots up to date.  My cat, Lily, is currently the longest living cat I have ever kept at a whopping 3 years of age.  Yay Lily!  Not surprisingly, she is also one of the smarter cats I have had.  Coincidence?  I think not.

Anyway, we were leaving to head out for a basketball game this past weekend and as I pushed the garage door shut, my daughter said something like "Momma, the cat is up on the thing".  Because I am such an attentive parent checking my instagram/facebook as I was backing out, I assumed the "thing" that she meant was the cabinet that we have hanging on the wall in the garage and didn't even look up.  That's ok, kiddo, and the garage door proceeded to close.  2 seconds later, she screams that the cat is stuck in the garage door.

And she was.

Like this:

Only there she was more bisected than in this picture.  Only ass, tail and back legs could be seen.

Had I been a good blogger and not distracted by the screaming of my child, I would have taken a picture.  Alas, I didn't.  Instead I quickly pushed the garage door open again and ran into the garage.  I began mentally preparing myself for the $2k+ vet bill and was fully expecting to see a broken cat howling in pain.

Guess what?  Cats are pretty squishy apparently and being compressed by a garage door is not all that damaging if it happens in the right spot.  I found her hiding behind the crap in the garage and was able to check her all over and she was perfectly fine.  Purring away later in the day.

post squish cat

It turns out that my husband had left the garage door open and while my car was parked in the garage, she had climbed up on top of the car and then got onto the open garage door and was sitting there when I backed out and closed the door.

I can see where that saying "curiosity killed the cat" came from.



In other news not related to feline death, I colored my own hair.  That was interesting.   I find out after the fact that you should choose a shade lighter than the color you want.  That would have been nice to know ahead of time....  So, whatever.  My hair is a little darker than I wanted.  Almost Elvira-like.  I don't mind it.  And it will fade.

I also colored my floor.  It doesn't look as good there as it does on my hair.  Too bad for me.

I suppose this is why people pay the hairdresser $50 instead of the do-it-yourself $9.  

Have you had any close calls with your pets?

Colored your own hair?

Would you Rather #2

Another exciting episode of "Would You Rather" is available for your reading pleasure today, folks!  Thanks to Rachel at Running in Real Life, I have some more super-duper interesting questions to answer.

Would You Rather:

~Run a race at -10 with slushy roads or 85* with the sun beating down?

~Wear running clothes that are way too tight or clothes that are way too loose?

~Have really big upper body muscles or really big lower body muscles? (the kicker here is that whatever you don't choose is super puny.)

~Travel to the past to meet your great-great grandparents or travel to the future to meet you great-great grandchildren?

~Watch your favorite sporting event on a large TV in your house or watch your favorite sporting even in person but have really crappy seats?


My answers:

1.  I would rather be hot than cold any day so I would rather run in the sun than the -10* slush.  85* and beating sun would rock my world right now.

2.  Too tight or too loose, that is a tough one.  I think I would rather have stuff be too tight, I know I would have unbearable chafing from stuff that was too loose.  I have a running skirt that is a little too big and every 15 seconds I'm hauling it up.  So annoying.

3.  I think I'd rather have strong legs although I don't like either choice.  Wah.

4.  I think I would rather travel to the future to meet my grandkids.  It would be cool to see what happens in the future and I wouldn't really want to go back in time.  I mean, what if there wasn't indoor plumbing or I had to haul water or milk cows or something like that?  No thanks.

5.  This one is so easy--I would totally rather be at the event in person.  Crappy seats or not.


I also picked a winner for the compression socks giveaway.  Thanks to all for entering!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Shoot me an email so I can send you your prize!!  bouchard@midcoast.com

What's Up?

It's been just about a week since I last posted something on this blog.  I really don't have any exciting stuff going on in my life so I'll share the mundane and boring instead.

Our family has been hit by the bug.  The Lacrosse bug, that is!  Right now everyone is all about lacrosse.  Not sure what tipped the scales in that direction, but all three kids are going to be playing this spring.  Even Princess!!  She's excited about it which is something that never happens.  Last weekend was partly spent getting everyone equipped with lacrosse gear.  The girls were pretty much set with all their field hockey gear, but needed a stick.  Manimal needed everything and guys stuff is pretty expensive.

Lucky for me I had some Dick's coupons that saved me $20 and that weekend our local Dick's was having a 20% off everything sale which saved me $110 AND they also price matched me a stick that I found online by showing it to the manager on my phone and that saved me $10.  Not bad.  Still expensive, but you always feel better when you save $140.

manimal ready to go.  complete with cup.  lol

I'm still getting outside for my runs despite the cold ass weather.  The temperature is really getting old, I wish we could just move on from 0*.  Really.  It's still below 0 more nights than not.  In March.  Whyyy??

 being grumpy about the weather.  notice in EVERY picture how I'm dressed.  Nanook of the North.

Contrast that with THIS post from almost exactly 2 years ago entitled "80* and a Running Skirt", in which I talk about how it's 80* out and I go running during my daughter's dance class in a running skirt and tank top.  So, so, so unfair.

Second picture from the top was yesterday (I had already taken off my jacket after the run), it was a whopping 35*, which is actually a huge improvement from the day before when the high reached 26*.

This happened yesterday too:

Yes, that's a Grumpy Cat stuffy.  And, yes, I know you are jealous.


Lastly, how many of you can say that you can talk to the turkeys?  Well, it is a special talent I have and here is evidence of it.

Don't be jealous.  You can learn how to talk to turkeys too.  It's not hard.  They are pretty stupid.  The males are all poofed up and strutting around like they are going to get some.  

In a nutshell what's up in my world is:

~lacrosse

~cold fucking weather

~turkeys trying to get it on

What's up in your world?  

Three Things for Thursday and a Giveaway!

**Disclaimer--I already had this mostly typed out when I realized that it wasn't Thursday.  <insert sad face>  All day long I have been thinking it's Thursday, when in fact, it's only Wednesday.

So I'm not changing the title now.  Just go with it.


1.  On Sunday my son was at a basketball tournament warming up when he got hit in the stomach with a ball that he didn't see coming.  He fell down, passed out and then proceeded to have what looked like a seizure to the other parents there.  I wasn't there because I was at another basketball game with my oldest so you can imagine the feeling I had when my husband called to tell me about it and to ask what he should do.  He didn't know if he should let him still play or not.

My first response was that he most certainly should not play if he indeed had a seizure and/or hit his head.   He didn't hit his head but there were no medical personnel available at the tournament to provide an opinion about whether he had a seizure or not.  A quick call to the ER for advice and we decided to take him in for evaluation.

He is fine now and it appears that he likely got hit in the solar plexus which caused a vasovagal response (basically passing out) and then had some involuntary movement from the brain not getting enough oxygen for a moment.

So scary.

2.  Songs that I am loving right now.

I am such a teeny bopper.  I can listen to it over and over.  At least it's not Justin Beiber.

I haven't heard this one on the radio yet, but I really love it.

This is just funny.

3.  This is what's happening right now.  W.T.F.  I am so done with this weather.

at least it's rain and not snow.  Always looking for the bright side.

Northern Maine is going to get pounded.

And now moving on to better things.

I have a pair of Nike neon yellow compression socks to give away.  I bought these not realizing that they were size LARGE.  Men's Large.  So clearly they don't fit me.  Brand new.  Ready to help someone BQ.

a Rafflecopter giveaway Have you ever had a kid have an emergency when you weren't there?

What songs are you loving?  I need a new playlist.

Would you Rather?

I love Would You Rather!! So fun!  Rachel at Running in Real Life posted some 'would you rather' questions today so I thought I'd play along.

Would you rather:

~Run an 'easy-effort' marathon that lasts 5+ hours or a 'hard-puke-your-guts-out' 5K that lasts 19 minutes?

~Have your pet sleep on your head or on your legs?

~Write a really good blog that no one reads or a really crappy blog that thousands of people read?

~Have Monday off from work or Friday off from work?

~Get an oozy blister on your foot during a race or chafing during a race?

~Run one really awesome race this year or dozens of crappy ones?


My answers:

1.  I would rather run a puke your guts out 5K.  Especially if I could run it in 19 minutes!!  That would rock my world!  I would be rockstar at 43 years old!!  If I could run a 5K that fast I would travel around to every local-yokel race and #winalltheprizes!!

I do not thrive at distances longer than 8-9 miles.

2.  My pets already know the answer to this--they get a kick in the ass if they are anywhere near my legs, but tons of love if they sleep on my pillow.  I CANNOT have anything near/around/touching my legs.  *annoying!*  Even the husband!!  Don't touch my damn feet.  Just don't.

3.  Oh, there are pros and cons to both of these, but I suppose I'd rather have a good blog that no one reads.  Although, it was really cool to have 500+ views of that one post about consequences.  That was kinda neat to have so many people read what I wrote.  I imagine it would eventually stress me out to try to write something interesting every time if I had that many people reading all the time.  Thankfully, I'm back to my usual 40-50 views.

4. FRIDAY for sure!  I already have Friday afternoons off and that is the balls!  Give me another year or two and I'll be down to a 4 day work week.

5.  I'd rather have chafing.  The chafing goes away in 2-3 days where the blister can take up to 2 weeks to heal.

6.  Well, if the one fantastic race got me a Ironman finishers medal then the answer is one great race.


Happy Weekend to all 40 of you!!

40 in 40 and the stealer of the juice

So I keep seeing this 40/40 thing all over facebook about 40 bags in 40 days.  Basically, you clean 40 small areas in your house and purge stuff you don't need, want or love.  One area each day.

I think it's a great idea.  I think I can actually do it.

It's not like 'spring clean your bedroom' is one of the tasks.  Well, I suppose it could be if you had that kind of time.  But instead, it looks more like this:

Day 1:  the vanity
Day 2:  junk drawers
Day 3:  closet
Day 4:  master bath drawers
Day 5:  kids vanity
Day 6:  refrigerator
Day 7:  pantry

and so on.  You customize it however you wish.  Just small tasks that might take 15-20 minutes at most but over the course of 40 days, you get a lot shit done.

It perfectly aligns itself with Lent.  So my former-non-practicing-Catholic-self can do this for Lent.  I'm going to give up clutter and hoarding for Lent!

trying to avoid this

I'll take before and after pictures so you all can see what gets done.  Also, so I actually do it and not slack off on day 6.....

Day 1 begins this evening.  Stay tuned.


Today at work a fellow came in for his eye exam--all fine and normal, right?  On his way in to said exam, he took a moment to plug his car into our building.

Yes, you read that correctly.

HE PLUGGED HIS ELECTRIC CAR INTO OUR BUILDING!!    To charge!!  While he was having an eye exam!

Without asking!!!!

File that under "biggest balls ever".  I wonder if he just assumed it was like plugging in an ipad to charge.  Or if he was trying to scam some free juice.  I would imagine that a car would draw a little more charge than an ipad.

Do we need to lock out outside outlets now?  what the....

Do you want to join me in the 40 bags in 40 days challenge?  Go ahead and hashtag it.  I'll follow on whatever media you wish. #40bags40days

Plugging in the car--ballsy or smart?  My vote is he's a thief!

The February Non-Review and Saying Goodbye

Normally I begin my monthly review by actually reviewing the month, but since I have lost my log book, I really have no clue what my monthly totals have been.  I can remember the last 2ish weeks but beyond that, my memory sucks.  I do follow a pretty regular pattern of exercise so I can make a reasonable guess as to what my totals were.  So here goes.

Run--36 miles.  Yuk.  What the heck do you expect for a short, shitty weather, stomach flu-fest month.  It's actually a little better than I thought.

Spinning--110 minutes of spin.

Swim--7000 yds

Tennis--7 hours of tennis.

Races--Mid-Winter Classic 10 miler.  Like the Beach to Beacon race, this is turning into one of my favorite races to do.  Not necessarily because of the distance, cause 10 miles really sucks ass any way you look at it, but because of the people who run it.  I have met so many fantastically NICE people running.  Really, people, if you don't run--you should!  People that run are nice.  They really are.

I had a PR, which is always nice, and it wasn't -15* out, so that's a bonus.

see how happy I look?  Yes, that's my happy face.

What I'm Loving--I am SOOOO loving that this month is over.  February was not the best of months in my life, the weather was crap and we all caught the stomach bug.  So I say Good Riddance! to Februrary.  Perhaps my level of happiness is directly related to the amount of running/exercise I am able to do.  Hmmmm.  I see a correlation there.

What I'm Disliking--oh my, so many things.  I'll just make a list:
~stomach bug
~puking kids
~puking kids that puke on the carpet--why? why? always the carpet.
~business being slow
~this fucking frigid cold weather that just won't go away.  Seriously.  Just. Go. Away.
~medical bills

Which brings me to the last part of this post.  Saying goodbye.

13 years ago, we got a puppy.  He was black and cute and furry and we named him Cole.
And apparently, that was way before I had a digital camera cause I can't find a single picture of him as a puppy saved on my computer.

oooh my babies are so little…

I made that doll house.  by hand.  glued every freakin' piece.

disregard the Cat digger that has fallen into the house it was demo-ing

He is clearly, the king of dog photobombing.

And best for last:

Cole was the only dog the kids have ever known.  We got him when our oldest was 1 1/2 so no one remembers a time without him.  He was a fetcher of all balls that were thrown.  For hours, he would fetch if someone would throw.  He was a good bird dog too, in his time.  He loved going on walks.  Really, he loved doing anything as long as he was with us.  Rides in the car, the boat, going to camp, hunting and just hanging out with us.  He never once, not once, bit anyone.  Those kids could pull on his ears (when they were babies), climb all over him and he would just lay there.

It is so hard to know when enough is enough.  So hard to make that decision.  Even harder to explain it to the kids.  How do you justify that choice when you aren't sure yourself?

My husband decided it was time.  I couldn't do it.  He took him and stayed with him.

And it's done.