Sounds That Make Me Crazy
1. Kids toys that beep, whirl, talk, sing or make any noise at all. Those were created by the devil for grandparents to give to their grandkids in order to get back at their own kids. That is really the only explanation I can come up with for why those toys are available. The noise setting is on 'make you deaf' level and there is no way a kid can learn anything valuable from Elmo laughing from being tickled or Buzz Light Year repeating "To Infinity and Beyond!". They are just sheer hell.
Any toy like that that happens to enter my house has a one way ticket to Goodwill.
2. The beeping noise my car makes when the automatic doors are not shut properly. I was close to tears one drive home when I couldn't make the stupid thing stop.
3. Multiple noises at once. TV on, kids
4. The waffling sound any SUV or minivan makes when the back windows are down and the front windows are up. I could commit murder-murder-suicide under those circumstances. It physically hurts my ears--the noise combined with the pressure of the air making the sound. Ai yi yi.
It. Physically. Hurts. Me.
Can you tell I have sensitive ears?
5. A radio commercial that is played locally where the guy is brushing his teeth while talking. Oh my. That brush brush sound is unbearable. Who the hell thought that was a good idea for a commercial?? I hope he's fired.
6. Repetitive noises of any kind. Foot tapping, lip smacking, clicking of the tongue, dog panting, balls bouncing off the wall, kids chanting. Whatever. It doesn't matter. I can tolerate a noise one or two times, but over and over? No way.
7. The window air conditioner that runs constantly in my bedroom. All. Summer. Long. Arrrrrghhh! So freakin' loud.
8. The nasally voice of any female from the New Jersey area. Gah. Awful. Just awful.
9. Cell phones ringing. There isn't a ringtone in this world that I can stand to hear. Mine is on vibrate. Always.
10. My kids talking back to me when they are in trouble. Seriously. It is clear that I am mad, why, why, why do they insist on pleading their case and telling me their side of the story when I saw the whole freakin' thing?? Just be quiet. Quiet is what I want.
Isn't that what we are all looking for? Just some quiet.